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“….don’t stand around moping, “I dunno what to do… I’m just not sure…” unless you want all of your tomorrows to look like your yesterdays.” –S. Pavlina
July 19 was my last post. YIKES! How did that much time go by? I’ve been dancing the tango with this project for a month now. The running has been on and off. And quite obviously, there has been silence in this forum as well. But I’m picking-up where I left off.
You see, I thought I’d take a week off. We were out of town for a few days…2 of the 3 days were supposed to include jogging. The first day I worked it in. The second day, it just wasn’t feasible to include a 10K run. (“It’s okay, LG…you’ll pick it up on Tuesday”). When Tuesday rolls around, I’m exhausted from my adventures and give myself permission to take the remainder of the week off to rest. That was the first spoke in the proverbial wheel of “Because I can…”
What a pleasant rest I had (yep, that’s lemons-into-lemonade for ya)! Sunday rolls around and I’m planning on trying that 10K from last Sunday. I change the scenery up a bit (thanks to my Sunday running partner) and WHAT A DISASTER!!! A-hem…I mean…the outcome wasn’t quite what I anticipated it to be…and good for me for listening acutely to my body. Yikes!!! Not failure, just feedback, right??!!! I made it half way through without stopping (Sunday’s are supposed to be 10:1 run/walk) then started a precarious stumble downhill from there. I was soooooo disappointed in myself. I soooooo wanted to return to the trail with vim and vigour, finishing strong, jogging the whole time. And WHAM!! The very opposite happened. Now how do I recover from that?
I’m pretty sure I didn’t run the week after that…or very little if I did. I was emotionally peeved at myself and wasn’t following the path of forgiveness. No siree, I was going to resent the hell out of my limitations!
And so I perpetuated this pathetic cycle for a couple more weeks, allowing self-depricating thoughts sabotage my plans, conveniently forgetting all the affirming beliefs that I’ve been nurturing since this journey began.
So now it’s Tuesday of this week and two lovely work colleagues (more than a decade younger than yours truly) invite me to join them for a lunch hour jaunt (that includes hills) on Wednesday. Figuring it was as good a time as any to shrug off the yoke of self-doubt, I accepted their invitation. Jinkies, I was nervous!!!! What if I slowed them down? What if I couldn’t keep up? What if I had to stop and walk? What if….
What a bunch of steamin’ horse SH*T! I can honestly say, I had serious performance anxiety before setting out (I can’t even imagine what olympic athletes go through!!). But it happened. And I did keep up…until half-way…and I did slow them down on the return trip (which they didn’t seem to mind), and I didn’t have to stop and walk (with a lot of silent “you can do it!!” sing-songing in my mind when negotiating the hills). I finished strong and recovered quickly and I’m okay with that.
I didn’t do any happy dances when I crossed the finish line. But I do feel like I’ve overcome a substantially large mental BOULDER that has been plaguing my progress. I couldn’t get over it, I couldn’t get under it, I couldn’t go through it, so I just went around it.
Therefore, have officially picked back up where I left off. And however it rolls-out from here, I will be grateful for the experience, no matter what it brings or where it takes me.
Peace xo
So I have two things to confess: 1. I’ve been super avoiding even thinking of running (I felt the tension all day) and didn’t want to go out tonight at all. And, I was supposed to do a 3K warm-up, 3 hills, then a 3K cool-down. But time and daylight did not permit me to get to the hills in time.
But excuses are not part of my “Because I can…” journey so….
Instead, I ran down the familiar country road, listening to new music and pushing myself beyond anything I’ve experienced so far. Elton John rocked through the ear buds and I kept time with my pace. Man, Elton’s songs are long!! LOL I managed a full 85% for at least 5 minutes and 20 seconds…the longest stretch yet. Then I allowed myself a wee bit of time to bring my heart rate back down then I was at it again with another face paced tune…and repeated a third time (3 hills, right?) It was fantastic.
Considering how I feel like I met “the wall” yesterday, today I pushed through it and I am relieved. Never give up…NEVER give up!!
Peace xo
I read a fabulous blog post today. It was about being aware of what we (and by “we” I mean “I”) say yes to on a daily basis.
My list (like others’ I suppose) would have things that I choose because I want to and likely things that I feel that I have to say yes to. And, there’s probably stuff that I say a tentative yes to that could probably be classified as a maybe.
But every action and thought are a choice. I really just want to fill my days with saying yes to things that fire me up, fill me with energy, and send me soaring into happy-land.
Running 5 times a week is a choice. I am saying yes to health. I am saying yes to challenging my horizons. I am saying yes combining my physical activity with my creative expression (aka blog :)).
What are you saying yes to?
Peace xo
I think I was mentally saving myself tonight and so I set out at a snail’s pace to do my run. Having a rest day in-between Sunday’s 9K and today’s 5K made a huge difference. The country road was so quiet…the scenery was beautiful, the music was keeping me in time.
It was a good run. I still had some left at the end of the go…I guess slow and steady does win the race after all. Today was the longest distance. Theoretically, the rest of the week will go well…right?!
Peace xo
Thank goodness for fluffy clouds in the sky! If it wasn’t for those shape-shifting formations that I could concentrate on while I was running, who knows what would’ve happened. LOL Is it a bunny? Teapot? Whale?
Now I’m sure that you’re wondering how it could be that I’m running AND looking at the clouds but sometimes a woman has to do what a woman has to do to shift focus away from burning lungs and tired legs. (It doesn’t hurt that I run along a country road either.)
I was okay for the first 6K then “because I can” kicked in. I was tired! I did manage an aggressive sprint to the finish…full boar…all out…emptied the tank. And then I thought I was going to pass out! Stars were whirling and birds were tweeting. It really wasn’t pretty. But I finished.
Tell me, do you sprint at the end of your run? If you do, are you pooped? Is it worth it if you feel yucky for the rest of the day? Hmmmmm
Thus, I begin week 5. Tuesday is 5K straight. It’ll be interesting.
Peace xo
Even when the day is forecasted to be a scorcher…even when the day’s itinerary is full…there’s always a way…if value is to be placed on the activity.
Thankfully it was cooler in the morning. It certainly didn’t feel as good as the day before, but getting it done when I said that I would was rewarding.
End of week 4, folks! Let’s keep this adventure going…
Peace xo
What a GREAT run this morning! The alarm clock rings at 5:20 a.m. I stare at it confused…what am I supposed to do now? Why am I awake at this time? Riiiiight…running shoe time! The forecasted high today is 34 degrees celcius. My practical brain tells me that running in 18 degrees is easier than 34. So out I go.
The air could be wrung out it’s so heavy with moisture. The windows are fogged on the cars and on the back patio door from humidity. But the air is cool and I am grateful.
And what a great run I had! Very little muscle or lung rebellion…and when I rounded the last corner, I realize that if I had to, I still have some steam left to keep going…WOW! Love it, love it, love it!
Happy Friday everyone!
Peace xo
It’s just time…all I need is time…how do I make the time…why am I doing time? LOL
Clearly, time was on my mind tonight. I didn’t get out until 9:15 p.m. which means it’s starting to get dark. It was still extremely balmy out but thankfully, a small breeze gave me breath from time to time.
It’s tough to get out 5 days a week. It’s tough to work the run into soccer schedules, laundry, and grocery shopping. It’s just tough.
But what I value, I make time for. It’s that simple. Without placing value on it, well, it just wouldn’t happen.
So tell me…how do you make time?
Peace xo
Week 4 – 4K prescription. Hot. Humid. Tired. Bloated. Long, long, long list of Laurie-Do’s waiting at home. Gotta go!
In desperate need of a distraction, I decided on a brand new route tonight. And here’s what kept me going…horse hoof tracks along the side of the road! In my mind’s eye I could see the strong, powerful, lean, beautiful animal trotting along gently in the companionship of its rider. I could sense its raw power just below the surface, its respect and obedience to its master, its gratitude for the ability to wander out and roam beyond its usual confines. I could image in flip of its tail and the shake of its mane as it stepped along the side of the country road…one step at a time.
All bodily systems were screaming at me to give in and give up tonight. But all I could do was put one foot in front of the other until I reached home. If it’s good enough for the horses, it’s good enough for me.
Peace xo
9K today! 9K today! 9K today…yikes! I will do this…because I can.
I am tremendously thankful to my faithful friend, Sonya, who joined me on my run today. She’s typically a 5K runner so this was a bit of a stretch for her as well. The company was awesome (you know…misery loves company?!) 
What amazed me was that just as soon as I hit the 3.5K marker (my turnaround point for the previous 3 Sundays), I felt like it was time to pack it in. What’s up with that?! It was at that crucial point that I knew that the remainder of the run would be a situation of mind over matter.
Just about 6K into the adventure, we could feel the spatter of small raindrops on our faces. Considering that I was just getting by at that point, the freshness of the water was such a relief. Then…the skies opened up!!!! WOW, did it pour. It was one of the best experiences…running through the rain with a dear friend…feeling the coolness, distracting me from my sluggishness, energizing me to continue on. I even shouted out a “WoooHoooo” a few times for the relief that the rain brought.
By the time I crossed the finish line with a feeble attempt at a sprint, I was spent. At least physically that is. Mentally, I was very pleased with how it all went down. Week four has begun as has the intensity. Watch out sports fans…it may not be pretty.
Peace xo
Because I can 